you, in my head

Fog, smoke, steam, scent. That is how you are in my head and my body. You permeate everything, I cannot help but breath you in because you surround me. I take you with me every where I go. Flowing through my blood stream, a seemingly innocuous phenomenon, you fill every molecule. I can see you when you are not here, I can taste you when are not here. I simply breathe and you are with me. In your presence I am content. You are with me when I stand still looking at a flowing stream. Your presence is in the music circulating through my ears.

    How did it happen? Why? Did I give you permission to come into my heart? Did you beguile me and charm me into letting you in? I think so. You enticed me with your words, your beauty, your scent. And here you are, living inside of me. Here with me, even when you are not. Did you smile to yourself when you felt me succumb to you? I think so. I carry that smile with me, on my own lips. I walk through stores smiling. I lay in my bed, alone and I am smiling.  I drive in my car and I smile, feeling your touches still lingering on my skin.

    My patience and faith led me here. I was distracted and left my gate ajar and you slipped in. First your cerulean eyes beckoned and I was curious. Then your voice closed the door behind me. My lungs took a deep breath and plunged further and there I was in your arms. Your softly strong arms. Arms that I feel caressing my shoulders while I write this and you are far away.

Napoleon said to Josephine, “I have seen only, I have admired only you, I have desired only you.” I add, “I have breathed only you.”